"The First Snow Accumulation of The Season"

      We had our first snow accumulation last night.  Naturally it left the roads slushy, mushy, and slick in spots.  Of course,  ever cautious yours truly putt, putt, putted along.  SUV's and trucks are demons on the roads.  They were whizzing by!  They must be fortified by force fields, or have steel reinforced bumpers. Nothing, not rain, sleet, snow, - Nothing slows them down!  These vehicles seem to have one speed, - warp!  I call them fast terrain vehicles.
     You look up in your rear view mirror, and the only thing you see are headlights headed straight at you.  Seemingly at the last minute, they veer over into another lane. Or, they'll ride your rear bumper so closely that it must be an intimidation tactic geared to make you speed up. What  would happen if I had to suddenly stop?  Hopefully, I'll never find out!
     I need a bumper sticker that says: "Middle-aged baby boomer whose senses are slowly failing, on board.  Your headlights are glaringly bright in my rear view mirror, and you are too close, so I can barely see you.  I don't hear so well anymore, so if you're blasting your horn as though to say 'get outta the way,' I likely won't hear it.  Should you rear-end me, and have to approach my driver side window to speak to me...mum's the word.  I don't know you, so I won't roll down my window, thus I, we, cannot talk."  Not sure exactly where that would leave things, so do me a favor, SLOW down.  And if can't do that, just stay away from Ms. Magoo here.  I'm the one putting along in the burgundy Corolla.